Snowflakes in Hell

From SayUncle:

The Pentagon plans on shooting down a spy satellite before it hits earth. If they need a 50 caliber sniper rifle capable of shooting down satellites, I think Josh Sugarmann can get it for them.

… a corporate “good neighbor” community program I can really get behind.

Sometimes bad eggs can get a hold of guns.

It’s past five, so I guess I can get this in early.   Seen at Uncle’s place:

Get a diesel. Then use biodiesel.

1 metric ton of dead hippies can be converted to 80 gallons of biodiesel via heat depolymerization.

Formerly annoying dead hippies are a nearly inexhaustable resource … and if we did exhaust them, people would cheer regardless.

And the hipiies carbon foot print goes to near zero once they stop breathing.

A win win scenario for all.

I don’t generally support growing fuel at the expense of food production, but this is one type of biofuel I can get behind!

As demonstrated on the official Ohio “we don’t want gun owner’s money” signs.

Ragin’ Dave has an amusing story to tell from his Army days.

Via the Real Gun Guys:

‘Twas the night before Christmas,
cold, dark and foreboding,
I sat at the work bench,
quite busy reloading.

The empties from autumn were polished so clear
for primers and powder and bullets from Speer
and Hornady´s soft-points, and Nosler´s Partitions
(my bench Ain’t no place for brand
name omissions!).

All sat in their boxes, right next to the
press with dies from Pacific, and RCBS,
when all of a sudden there came such a jolt,
I grabbed for my Benelli and whipped out my Colt.

As I spilled Hodgdon’s powder all over the shelf,
I scrambled for cover, just to protect myself.

From up on the rooftop, came hoofbeats and snorting
like the noise out of L’il Rock from Clinton’s cavorting!

I eased off the safety to press-check my
auto with 230-talons I’ll knock ‘em all blotto.

Were these rogue federal agents sent by Schumer and Reno ?
Or a staggering Ted Kennedy, in bad need of vino?

My question was answered with a knock, and some sneezing,
“It’s Santa, you moron, lemme in there, I’m freezing!”

I flipped off the dead-bolt and threw the door wide
to find St. Nick a shivering, Rudolph by his side.
He eyeballed my A.K. with a nod of approval
“You’re all set,” he said, “for dirtball removal.”

“But this is no raid, we’re not here to harm you
nor persecute, prosecute, nor even disarm you.”
“Instead,” said dear Santa, “I needed to borrow
your .357 ’till day after tomorrow.”

“It’s okay,” he assured me, with a hint of frustration,
“I’m enrolled in the National Rifle Association.”

He showed me his card, ’twas a Life Member rating,
“I’ve had this since me and the missus were dating!”

“And you see, Dave, ol’ buddy, I’ve gotten real nervous
since Feinstein was elected with a promise to serve us.

So henceforth as I’m out there, my presents a stackin’,
I want to assure you, I’m legally packin”,
and my gift for you this year should give you a hoot
I’ve told the Supreme Court to give Brady the boot!

Now, Rudy and I must be on our way,”
he said as he climbed back in his sleigh.
With the reins in his hand and my Colt in his pocket,
he jingled the sleighbells and was off like a rocket.

With a pair of speedloaders and ammo to spare,
I knew he’d be safe, he was loaded for bear!

As he faded from view, I could still hear him calling
“From D.C., where ‘P.C.’ is already falling.
To bad guys in L.A. , Detroit and Atlanta ,
“I’m licensed to carry, don’t go messin’ with Santa!”

This is hilarious:

Apparently this is a reality TV show called “Gay Army“. If I were gay, I’d be offended. Maybe European gay folks are a little more wimpy than the gay guys I know.

Ahab reviewed “I Am Legend”:

A little backstory first: this is the 3rd attempt to adapt the novel I am Legend into a movie. To be candid, the first two attempts sucked. “The Last Man on Earth” and “The Omega Man” were perfect examples of Hollywood past taking a good story and raping it to death and then defecating on the corpse.

I think we’ll have to revoke his NRA membership for saying bad things about a Charlton Heston movie ;)

This is really funny.

I noticed this quite funny comment over on Bryan Miller’s blog:

Dear Mr. Miller:

As you know, the Supreme Court shortly will be making a weighty decision concerning the future of American freedom as it resides within the Second Amendment. I know we are diametrically opposed on this issue. However, the die has been cast and now we as a nation will finally have an answer to a question which both sides have sought for decades.

I have made a layman’s study of arguments from the pro and anti-gun rights perspectives and am firmly convinced that the Court will hold that the right to keep and bear arms is an individual right, not one reserved to the state. But what value is rhetoric if not backed up by a concrete demonstration of one’s firm belief?

Thus, my point in posting this message is to challenge you to a friendly personal wager regarding the outcome of the Heller case. If the Supreme Court holds that the Second Amendment does not protect an individual right to keep and bear arms, I will personally present you with a certified check in the amount of $100 payable to your charity of choice. I will do so at a New Jersey place and time of your choosing, and in honor of the nanny state you represent, while wearing a diaper and drinking milk from a baby bottle.

Conversely, if the Supreme Court should hold, what every person who can read plainly the King’s English already knows, that the Second Amendment protects the individual right to keep and bear arms, you will present me with a certified check in the amount of $100 payable to my charity of choice. You will do this at a time and New Jersey place of my choosing while wearing full camouflage and bearing an unloaded New Jersey compliant AR-15 (semi-automatic, no lugs for drive-by bayoneting, no adjustable stock, magazine capacity restricted to 15 rounds, etc.), while keeping your finger off the trigger and muzzle pointed in a safe direction.

The gauntlet has been thrown. Demonstrate the courage of your convictions as I am willing to do and accept this challenge of the ages! This offer expires at 5 PM EST on Friday, December 21, 2007.

Respectfully Submitted in Good Faith and Credit,

Matthew Carmel
mcarmel@constitutionarms.com

I sincerely hope Bryan will take him up on this wager!  But my bet is there’s no way he’ll take it.

This amusing post from Scott Adams reminds me of my gambling experience in Reno while attending the Gun Blogger Rendezvous.  Scott suggests that casinos eventually just set up ATMs to make noise and flash lights so people feel entertained.

I was amused at the notion of this, and wondered if people would fall for it.  It’s possible, I mean, we all spent a lot of money converting our hard earned dollars into flashes and noise for entertainment without any hope of a payoff, other than better skills to doing so ;)

Clayton has a rather amusing story involving a moose and some power lines.

… another country’s national anthem, it’s really important to get the pronunciation correct.  Or maybe not if makes you the hero of soccer fans in that country.

Well, if we can’t laugh at ourselves, who can we laugh at?  I thought this was pretty funny.

Funny.

Via Squeaky

Apparently soon (but not soon enough) to be former Mayor of Philadelphia, John Street, is going to be teaching a course on urban politics at Temple University. Wyatt has some pretty amusing thoughts on what the topics of his classes might be.

This is a very amusing story out of the UK:

The pupil’s mum had ordered an agency to give her son a “surprise” on his 16th birthday - and the teacher had even agreed to film the prank.

But it all went wrong when the unnamed company sent a stripper dressed as a policewoman instead of a “gorillagram” - in what it called a booking error.

I’m guessing the kid probably isn’t too distraught about the mix up.

From Scott Adams.

Credit for this goes to DaveM55 on PA Firearms Owners Association:

You can carry in a house,
you carry with a mouse.
You can carry in a car,
and even in a bar.
You can’t carry in the court,
but you can around the port.
You can carry eating supper,
you can carry an AR upper.
You can’t carry in the school,
but you can carry playing pool.
You can carry more than one gun,
you can carry while you run.
You can carry with your brother,
you can carry a real big mother.
You can carry in a boat,
you can carry with a goat.
You can carry hollow point ammo,
you can carry wearing camo.
You can carry it under a shirt,
you can carry till it hurts.
You can carry it unconcealed,
you can carry in a hayfield.
You can carry in a tree.
it’s good to carry you will see!

From Scully in the comments:

And I think Hillary is a complete idiot that would be doing personal bankruptcy law in Toad Suck, Arkansas if she hadn’t stayed married to Bill.

Not a big Rudy fan, but I though this was pretty hill-arious:

Bitter mentioned that she hearts farkers.  This comes courtesy of Fark as well, and is very seasonal.

How about this one?  The kids will love it!

SayUncle links to some fun poking at H&K.